If you want to attract the opposite sex, you can use flirting to show interest. Opening up deeper levels of communication will show you are interested in pursuing a relationship. You as the suitor needs to make the person feel comfortable, entertained, and aware that you have a romantic interest. This can be accomplished with conversation, touching, body language, and eye contact. By using these 4 methods of establishing attraction, you can establish a rapport, while avoiding the “friend zone”.
Initiating conversation shows the other person you have an interest. Asking questions about things such as personal interests, hobbies, and likes/dislikes is a type of flirting. Talking about shared interests can help you connect on a deeper level. You will be much more successful with flirting through conversation, than strictly body language. You have to connect with the person on a friend level, before you can connect romantically.
What Music/Movies/TV Shows Do You Like? – most people on the planet have strong interests in music, movies, or television. These topics can be a great conversation starters, and can help your discover your interest’s likes/dislikes.
What Do You Do For Fun? (i.e. what are your hobbies) – having a shared hobby can escalate a connection between 2 people. If two people both play an instrument, or like the same sports team, they will have alot to talk about. Finding common interests is one of the most difficult parts of connecting.
I Like Your Shirt/Smile (compliments) – Throwing out compliments can show that you are interested. But, overdoing this can backfire. If you compliment too often, it puts you beneath the other person in a conversation and can come off as annoying. Relationships require two people of equal or close social status. Always apologizing or using too many compliments will lower your social status.
Having some kind of physical contact, is a guaranteed way to escalate your flirting. This will let the other person know that you are interested beyond simple conversation. Touching your target on the arm or the back, while in conversation can help move a relationship from “friends” to “more than friends”.
Using physical contact to display your attraction is known as “Kino Escalation“. Touching shows your target you are interested in moving the conversation or relationship to the next step. The person’s reaction will also give you an idea, of what the other person feels. If you notice that the other party shy’s away, when you touch their arm or shoulder, they might not be ready to escalate the relationship. This may be a clue that you need to continue conversation. It may also mean that the other party is not interested. If a person tends to shy away multiple times, it most likely means that they are not interested in your advances.
Direct eye contact is an important part of flirting. If a person holds your gaze longer than normal, they may feel attraction towards you. Maintaining eye contact can show you are interested. Good eye contact can lead to more intimate conversation or physical contact. It is one of the most direct types of body language that can communicate interest or attraction. If the other party seems to be uncomfortable with your eye contact, it may mean that they are not interested.
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